Surviving a Narcissist, Winning in Court, and Reclaiming Your Power
How one woman turned a 20-year marriage to a manipulative sex addict into a mission to help others escape emotional and legal abuse.
This week on The Scarlet Edit, I sat down with Lisa Johnson, co-founder of Been There, Got Out — a high-conflict divorce strategist and certified domestic violence advocate who helps people around the world navigate life after abuse.
Lisa’s story isn’t just shocking. It’s a masterclass in survival, self-trust, and radical transformation.
For nearly two decades, Lisa was married to a narcissistic sex addict who weaponized therapy, intimacy, and control to keep her small. He lied, cheated, manipulated, and gaslit — while convincing the outside world that their marriage was picture-perfect.
What started as intellectual chemistry and safety on paper became a long descent into coercive control and psychological warfare. From “training sessions” disguised as therapy assignments to years of deceit, Lisa learned the hard way that emotional abuse doesn’t always look like screaming — sometimes, it sounds like logic.
And then, she fought back.
When her ex refused to comply with court orders, Lisa represented herself for seven and a half years. Her case became Connecticut case law, paving the way for future victims of legal abuse. She even helped get Jennifer’s Law passed — expanding the legal definition of domestic violence to include coercive control, digital abuse, and financial manipulation.
Today, Lisa channels her pain into purpose. Through Been There, Got Out, she teaches others how to spot manipulation, represent themselves confidently in family court, and rebuild their lives after narcissistic or high-conflict relationships.
Her story is proof that redemption doesn’t come from forgetting what happened — it comes from reclaiming your voice and using it to change the system.
If you’ve ever been silenced, second-guessed, or shamed into staying quiet, this episode is your reminder:
You are not crazy.
You are not broken.
And you are not alone.
If you or someone you know is experiencing emotional abuse, call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 or visit thehotline.org for confidential support.
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Related Reading:
The Truth About Narcissistic Partners, When Grief Meets a Narcissist, When a Woman Finally Has Enough
